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Gleefully single seniors: ‘If I wanted to feel complete, it had to come from within’ | Australian lifestyle

“Be yourself” applies not only to people in their 20s and 30s, but also to some seniors.

Being alone in later years is stigmatized as loneliness, but living in your own words, whether or not you need to share a bed or have dinner on someone else’s schedule. Some people like it. Here, five happy single seniors tell their stories.

“No criticism”

Di Moloney, 72, Melbourne

Diane Moloney: “I want to say I’m single successfully.”

Di Moloney married in her mid-20s and divorced in 1987 at the age of 36 after having two daughters with her husband. “I wasn’t interested,” she already “had enough friends and associates.”

“Now I chose to stay single for years,” Moloney says. “Cook when you want, eat what you want, drink when you want to drink wine. You will never be criticized by anyone. There are many benefits to being single.

“I can say I’m single successfully.”

“The bigger problem is living with someone.”

Kelly Lorimar, 70, Sydney

Kelly Lorimar on the beach in Western Australia
Kelly Lorimar says her relationship with her children and grandchildren is her priority.

Kelly Lorimar married her husband in 1973, a month after she first met. They had two children and spent 14 years together until they parted. Since then, she has been single for over 30 years.

Lorimar, who suffered a brain injury in a car accident 20 years ago, is a disabled person and is receiving a pension. She lives alone, but being alone is not a problem, she has some close friends, and there are various caregivers who come every week and are active in the local community as members of a local writer group. Please note in particular. An organization that supports “fighting developers”.

“I think the bigger problem is living with someone,” she says. “I think it’s complicated to live with someone, even before you get a brain injury.”

She says that one of the main benefits of not having a partnership is “independence.”

“I miss my kids because they live on the interstate and are isolated from their grandchildren.

“There is no constriction”

Shirley Fisher, 70, Encounter Bay, South Australia

Shirley Fischer has been married for 22 years, has two children, has been divorced for 20 years and is single. When she tied the knot with her current ex-husband, they “loved each other very deeply” but left. “Now I am at this point in my life, so I am very happy and where I am. I’m very happy with it, “she says.

“You don’t have to make excuses or work on someone else’s schedule, so if I’m having a weird day and just want to sit here and read a book, sit here I read a book, or when I want to do gardening, I do it … I and my time are unlimited. “

But she says: They are apples in my eyes. “

Currently, my son lives in Melbourne, my daughter lives in Los Angeles, and both children live in different cities and have their own families. As a result, she can’t meet them the way she wants, but she keeps in touch by zooming and regular phone calls.

“I’ve been alone for a long time, so I’m very independent.”

“Friendship is more valuable”

Bruce Cowper, 74, Sydney

Bruce Cowper at his home in Sydney.
Bruce Cowper: “We have come to the conclusion that the best way to break a good friendship is to enter into a romantic relationship.” Photo: Curly Earl / Guardian

Bruce Cowper has been married twice and has no children. For over a decade, he has lived without a partner, instead focusing on friendship, hobbies and self-fulfillment.

“I’ve experienced a lot of relationships. [in the past] Because I was looking for someone to enrich my life. And I came to the conclusion that I was barking at the wrong tree. If I wanted to be happy and complete, it had to be in me, not in someone else. “

“And I came to the conclusion that the best way to break a good friendship is to enter into a romantic relationship. And I decided that friendships are more valuable to me. I don’t want to break it. “

He laughs that it has to find “someone” loaded with “big fortune and private jets”.

“I’m doing very well”

Jessica *, 73, Victor Harbor, South Australia

Currently, Jessica *, who has two adult children, has been married twice and had a friendly farewell two years ago. “I don’t want to feel miserable for the next 10 years,” she says. “I want to live the way I want to live”

Jessica admits that she had financial problems with her separation, but she manages with an old-age pension. “I’m doing very well. I’m not spicy and I’m still comfortable drinking a glass of wine. You can afford to eat, eat well, and sometimes go out for coffee or dinner. “” But you have to learn to live within your income. Most women I know I do. “

In the case of Jessica, things went up after choosing to be single again. “I lived alone with my husband for five years and I should have remembered the wonders of life at the time. You can choose what to do and how to do it. You can, and instead of cleaning up with others, you can clean up and clean up the place for yourself. She also says, “It’s great to have a bed all to yourself.” ..

Understanding how good singleness is, she hopes that her daughter, who recently broke up from her third marriage, will follow in the following footsteps:

*Jessica requested a name change for privacy

Gleefully single seniors: ‘If I wanted to feel complete, it had to come from within’ | Australian lifestyle Source link Gleefully single seniors: ‘If I wanted to feel complete, it had to come from within’ | Australian lifestyle

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